The Outsiders' Edge

Welcome back to the Edge. I hope you are all having a fine summer weekend. Big things happening in Elevation Nation and the sports world in general over the last few days.

Thank you to all the new readers who came across the website in the past few days. The Brock Lesnar piece and Saint’s golf column really allowed us to establish a beachhead in the blog world due to our swell relationship with Google and the fact so many of you desperately want to chuck a hand grenade into my car.

It is sufficient to say that the Elevation Summer Death Tour 2009 is still in full swing. The recent passings of Steve McNair, Arturo Gatti, and Walter Cronkite have continued to prove that the cryptic door I opened to the after life is still wide open. Lets just say, that if I’m Pope Benedict I’m booking a reservation to the Mayo Clinic for the next few weeks, until this thing slows down.

Watch your back King. The Elevation Curse isn't opposed to a freak suspenders accident. Just ask Carradine.

First of all- how crazy is this Watson thing? Holy hell. Saint will offer a more comprehensive recap of the Open Championships next week, but I just wanted to state a few points. I am rooting so badly for Watson to win on Sunday. Since Tiger Woods has decided it is more important for him to retain his relationship with Hank Haney instead of win majors, it is fantastic that a Disney like story has emerged to fill the nation’s golf attention. I suppose Haney has helped Tiger become a better non-major player as the wins in DC and at Jack’s tournament have recently shown, but he has not helped Tiger become a better major player. His driving is far too erratic to contend consistently at majors. I know people will still cry about the knee healing, but I think a 59 year old man who had a hip replacement AFTER Tiger’s knee surgery has pretty much blown that excuse out of the water. Secondly, it isn’t like some amazing young stud of a player has emerged and started winning all these majors. Its been guys like Angel Cabrera, Lukas Glover, Trevor Immelman, etc. who have beaten Tiger in major competitions with stunning regularity. I suppose Tiger is still the best player in the world, there hasn’t been any single guy to rise up and challenge him, but the difference between him and the cloud of second tier players is tighter than ever before.

What is faker- this smile or Hank Haney's credentials as a world renowned golf instructor?

But enough about Tiger, I honestly believe he will fire Haney and set things right in the near future, how amazing has Tom Watson been? He has shown incredible poise and a brilliant game plan at Turnberry. I thought Greg Norman’s run in 2008 was incredible, but this has been something else. I feel much more confident about Watson’s chances than Norman’s. Last year the Shark was playing a devil be damned style and was really going for broke. It was only a matter of time before that strategy fell to ashes. Watson has been far more steady. Much more of a Mo Rivera to Norman’s Mitch “Wild Thing” Williams. I also think Norman had a greater challenge in the final round last year with Paddy Harrington in his group, than with anybody Watson has to contend with tomorrow. Matthew Goggin and Ross Fisher are fine competitors, but they are not up to Paddy Harrington’s (Circa 2008, jesus he sucks in 2009) quality. Stewart Cink and Lee Westwood are also in the running, but we’ve seen them come up short many a time in majors over the last few years. However, I do think Westwood will present Watson with a stern challenge. Luckily they aren’t in the same group. If Watson does win this thing it will be because of his stellar play at 16 and 17. Watson has turned 16 into a birdie hole due to his Hezbollah ability to make bombs and 17 is a very easy hole. I think Watson will be able to make up two strokes on those holes or add insurance to his lead, should anything go bad on Sunday.

Never fucking mind.

On a personal note, I can’t put into words the surreality of watching Tom Watson, who  I followed for a good bit at the 2002 US Senior Open in Baltimore contend for a non Champions Tour major in 2009. It would be one thing if the guy had just joined the Senior Tour and won a tourney ala Fred Funk or Mark O’Meara, but Watson has been playing with the Seniors for 9 years. Who knows how this will inspire aged athletes? Maybe Wayne Gretzky will put the skates back on, maybe Mark Spitz will jump back in the poo, maybe Freddy Adu will make the American World Cup team in 2010? Its a crazy world out there. Come on Tom, win this damn thing!

Now, in the non golfing world, yesterday I had the displeasure of seeing Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince with a few relatives at a local theater. The movie did a solid job of explaining the story in the book, but it was just really looooooooooooooooooooooong. There wasn’t really much of a climatic pay off either to reward the audience for their patience. I read all of the Harry Potter books, I was never bored reading one of the books. I was bored enough to the point that I fell asleep for fifteen minutes in the middle of the picture yesterday. I don’t know. I have heard this movie compared to The Dark Knight and The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, and I can tell you that Potter was nowhere near their league. The cinematography was great. The acting was incredible. Big props to Helena Bonham Carter and Jim Broadbent who stole the show as Bellatrix LeStrange and Professor Slughorn. Carter was so great. If she was in the film more, her performance would have been the female equivalent of Heath Ledger in Dark Knight. The scene where she and Fenir Greyback attacked the Weasley’s house was the best in the entire movie. That particular scene was Dark Knight meets Halloween with the fire and the corn field and all. Great stuff. If the entire film had been that exciting, I most definitely would not have fallen asleep during it.

Helena Bonham Carter- I did not pass out during any of her scenes.

The other funny thing about the Harry Potter movie was the way Dumbledore looked EXACTLY like Gandalf from Lord of the Rings. They didn’t look that similar when Richard Harris played the role, but my God Michael Gambon looks just like Ian McKellen in LotR. Whenever Gambon was on screen, I kept looking for walking trees to appear in the background. If you don’t believe me, look at the pictures:

Gandalf

Very nearly Gandalf

On Sunday the ESPYs will be airing on ESPN. I would like to create my own category. Forget about the Arthur Ashe Humanitarian of the Year Award, I would like to present the “Excellence in Peep Hole Films” Award to the dude who filmed the Erin Andrews naked in her hotel room footage. Now I know that it a gross violation of privacy and that the bastard should be thrown in jail for a long time, but DAMN. The video has been taken down from just about everywhere, but if you would like to see a still photo of the movie in question do a Google Video search of ‘Erin Andrews’ with safe search turned off. The videos were taken down, but for some reason a still photo is still there. I definitely did not fall asleep while watching that film. One of my friends send me a cryptic text message implying that a sex tape or something like that of a famous female athletic personality had hit the net. My initial thought was “Christ, SJX must have kidnapped Paula Creamer!” Luckily that was not the case. In retrospect, I was also glad that the stalker video was taken of Erin Andrews and not one of her colleagues at ESPN like Jon Miller or Chris Berman. That particular video would get less hits than a montage of great moments in Curling history.

I feel sorry for Erin Andrews. I really do. She is a fine looking woman, and I’ll admit that it is nice watching her admire her own ass in the mirror is a fun thing to do, but no person deserves to have their privacy violated like that. I hope that the authorities punish the guy who took the film and the hotel itself where the incident took place.

A photo of Erin Andrews taken with her knowledge.

Alright everybody. Keep following us on Twitter, and listen to my radio show. A few major guests will be appearing in the coming weeks, so stay tuned for that.

Lets go Watson! Don’t see Harry Potter, and make sure SJX isn’t in the hotel room next to you.

Peace!